Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
