Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
