only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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