So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
i need some magic done to my vagina
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
