Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
