I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Randomize
