Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
