I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize