He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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