I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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