oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
