Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Quick, to the slutcave!
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
