Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
