If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
