I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
