Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
