you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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