Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
