just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
