p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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