the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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