I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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