the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
