areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
