I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
