He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize