butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
