CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
