so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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