Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize