Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
its liver damage thursday
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
