All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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