you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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