I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
my liver is dry heaving
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize
