it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
