It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
