New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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