At least make sure they are 18
Why
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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