Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
you would pick up someone in the library
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
