I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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