didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
