Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
