Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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