Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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