hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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