rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize