If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
