I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
