So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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