just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
