idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
