I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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